Self Development – Woman of Substance International

Codepencency

admin — Thu, 17 Feb 2022 14:46:29 +0000

“There are two questions a man must ask himself: The first is ‘Where am I going?’ and the second is ‘Who will go with me?’ If you ever get these questions in the wrong order you are in trouble.”
– Sam Keen, Fire in the Belly: On Being a Man –

CODEPENDENCY is a behavioral condition in a relationship where one person enables another person’s addiction, poor mental health, immaturity or underachievement. Common signs include low self esteem, no or very poor boundaries, lack of communication or clear communication, people pleasing personality, being in denial, obsession with partner, excusing bad or abusive behavior, doing anything to keep relationships afloat, manipulating and controlling and so on.

Evidently anyone exhibiting such behavioral conditions will experience limited progress because he has limited his personal growth due to an invisible giant threatening his effectiveness.

What triggers codependency? How does one deal with such dysfunctionality? Are you codependent or just caring? What does a codependent parent look like? The Masterclass In Authentic Living will provide insights to some self identity breakers that have mitigated against your personal growth and fulfillment. You will be empowered to desire more. . . Read Busola’s testimonial here.

If you have not registered for the masterclass, what are you still waiting for? Take action now, please click the registration link.

I look forward to seeing you in class!

A Note to My Younger Self

admin — Wed, 31 Mar 2021 19:42:51 +0000

This title does not in any way suggest that I have finally given up on being youthful. Well, what cannot be denied is that, before turning 60 (which I did on March 29), there are obvious “check engine lights” that flicker all over your body. From the streak of grey that sings victory songs over the failing hair dye, to the body that begins to creek like old furniture. In all of these, the horn of God’s faithfulness blares loudest in my ears.

I am sure one thing that comes with the territory is self reflection. This piece tells my younger self (with the benefits of old age) the possibilities that exist and the pathway to follow.

Pursue God

I believe it is possible to make a personal commitment to Jesus as a child. One of my daughters did at age 6. Because we grow in the knowledge of God and our relationship with Him, accepting the Lordship of Christ as a child affords one the opportunity to make all your mistakes, act out the rebellious teen years, the foolishness of youth and mature, settle down and settle in Christ.

“But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name:” ‭‭John‬ ‭1:12‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

In Christ, we become, continually being transformed from glory to glory.

Pursue Purpose

Purpose is the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. Purpose is the reason for your creation. Only God who made you knows the reason why He did when He did. Part of the benefits for pursuing God is that in the course of your relationship, He will tell you your purpose. “Then the word of the LORD came to me, saying: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah‬ ‭1:4-5‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Jesus knew his purpose as a child and focused on it. Read Luke 2:41-49.

Being aware of your purpose will birth a vision that will become your roadmap as you sail through life. Knowing your purpose will prevent wasteful and foolish pursuits that often lead to heartaches. Knowing your purpose particularly as a young lady will set the tone for who you marry, if you plan to. Knowing your purpose is very pivotal to having a sense of self worth, positive self esteem and sense of identity.

“When purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable” – Myles Munroe

Pursue Excellence

Matshena Dhliwayo is quoted as saying, “Excellence in obscurity is better than mediocrity in the spotlight.”

No one stands out by striving for mediocrity. You must push ahead, challenge yourself to be more, and do all things with the spirit of excellence.

“Then this Daniel distinguished himself above the governors and satraps, because an excellent spirit was in him; and the king gave thought to setting him over the whole realm.” Daniel‬ ‭6:3‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The Next 60 years. . .

As you sail through the world, Bimpe, let God remain at the center of your life, let Jesus be the reason why you live, and let the Holy Spirit be the wind that carries you!

Have It All – A 30 Day Challenge!

admin — Wed, 31 Mar 2021 01:08:00 +0000

Every month is unique. Having a theme every month challenge you to be focused, avoid distractions and channel your efforts towards predetermined outcome.

“THEN HE showed me the river whose waters give life, sparkling like crystal, flowing out from the throne of God and of the Lamb Through the middle of the broadway of the city; also, on either side of the river was the tree of life with its twelve varieties of fruit, yielding each month its fresh crop; and the leaves of the tree were for the healing and the restoration of the nations. [Gen. 2:9.]”
Revelation 22:1-2 AMPC

So, what are you focusing on this month? Remember whenever there’s no vision, people cast away restraints.

This month we are challenging ourselves to unlock abundance because our April theme is ABUNDANCE. It refers to life in its abounding fullness of joy and strength for spirit, soul and body. Abundance signifies a contrast to feelings of lack, emptiness, and dissatisfaction which may motivate a person to seek for the meaning of life and a change in their life. This is what this challenge seeks to accomplish- a visible change in our status.

It is heartwarming to note that God wants all His covenant children to prosper and experience abundance in all areas of life. Abundance means to have it all!
3 John 2, John 10:10. And, God is the Source of exponential abundance.

“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us,”
Ephesians 3:20 NKJV

Recognizing that I have a part to play, I challenged myself to undertake a focused 30-day prayer challenge lasting only 35 minutes every midnight EST from 1st – 30th of April. I’m extending the invitation to you as well. The flyer provides needed information. And, every day I share my inspirations which translates to our prayer points.

Check my Facebook page for daily inspirations to pray about. Of course, you can add yours.

Together, let us break limits and barriers to our abundance at the prayer altar and experience showers of blessings beyond what we have ever known.

Premature Emotional Investment

admin — Wed, 17 Feb 2021 20:16:52 +0000

“When you look at someone through rose colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.”

Have you ever found yourself often thinking why you’re with a particular person even when you know they’re not worth your time or effort but you went with it anyway?
It is partly because everyone has a need to love and be loved. It is an innate need. People will do anything for love – marry the wrong person because of fear of loneliness, get into immorality, put up with physical, verbal and mental abuse, substance abuse, join fraternity or a gang just to be loved.

Although the need for love is experienced all through human lifetime but like all behaviors, the learning process starts as soon as a child is born. A newborn responds warmly to her mother’s cuddles and soft loving whispers with smiles and restful sleep whereas a child that is often ignored grows up to become emotionally maladjusted if care is not taken early enough.

At adolescence, this need escalates and because they are experiencing diverse growth spurts at this time, young adults experiment with romantic relationships that oftentimes jeopardizes their emotional stability as an adult. Because they are yet to come to full grasp about their identity, young adults and some immature adults alike, may sometimes prematurely invest in relationships that are unworthy of their time or effort. Here are a few examples of premature emotional investment in unhealthy relationships:

You sacrifice your authentic self when they wouldn’t.
You often find yourself being emotionally exhausted with them when they wouldn’t
You tolerate their disrespectful behavior even when they fail to see it
You can’t freely talk about your feelings or discuss your future.

When these behaviors predominate a romantic relationship, that relationship is unhealthy and is heading towards wreckage. No one should endure an abusive or toxic relationship. It will stifle and destroy you. If anyone finds himself or herself in such a relationship, they should seek help. At Connect Coaching Center, such help is available. We shall walk alongside you to uncover the ‘why’ of such a situation and help you discover your innate ability to be healed, restored and find love in a healthy way.

You should also register for my upcoming webinar, BEFORE & AFTER YOU SAY “I DO.” You will gain powerful insights on how, why, and what of healthy relationships, among other benefits. Delay no longer. Register now – https://bit.ly/BeforeYouSayIDoWebinar